My best friend is probably my soulmate, but I go back to campus this week. He's been one of my closest friends for years upon years, but after we got our diplomas I headed to a university some odd distance away and he's stayed in town. There were times in high school one of us would catch feelings for the other, but we'd just keep it under wraps and laugh about it seemingly after the feeling had passed. He knows about the crushes I've had at uni. He knows about the main one, especially, that spanned almost the entirety of this past year. And I know about everyone he's taken an interest in as well!! But this summer, things got a bit interesting. It started as just the two of us kissing "as friends" which is almost never what it actually is. One day, when we were hanging out as friends do, i asked him if an upcoming movie we were seeing together was a date. One Really awkward conversation later, we decided upon declaring it a date and seeing how it went for the sake of having fun together! And then it was time to see the movie. We dressed up all cute, and had a fantastic time. We went back to his place to hang out and watch cartoons (and also kiss a bit), and all in all it was a very nice date. A very nice date that left me wondering how to go forward. For the majority of the year, I am not in town. And I really don't think either of us would be happy doing something long-distance. So we left things open for the sake of potentially reassessing at a better time, which i appreciated, but I'm still afraid for the future. He understands me better than anyone else ever has. He's my BEST FRIEND. He's the one person I dont judge myself around. I can talk and act like ME without being scared of being "too much" of anything. My energy is never too high or low for him. His is never too high or low for me. And that's not even to say that we're always in-sync -- we're NOT, we just appreciate one another's company in all forms in a way that's so hard to find. Truth be told, neither of us quite know if we're fully into each other romantically. But we know we love each other in one way or another, and that love is strong, and we WOULD go on more dates if I were staying in town longer. But I'm not. So I'm stuck being scared of losing any feelings for him I have while I'm gone this semester, and falling for someone else and never getting to experience going out with him more!! Jury what do I do???